Yeah, we’re “those” people.

I vividly remember the day we were sitting in the reproductive endocrinologists office for our consultation. There were actual fertility masks in her office. I quickly glanced to her degrees on the wall making a mental note to check her residency program’s reputation.  We had waited 3 months for the appointment (and that’s actually getting in a month early)! We sat there looking at each other and having to admit we were “those people” now. It shined a giant spotlight on the reality that we were officially joining the elite ranks of the reproductively defective.

The 6 months that followed made us realize what being “those people” meant. We endured every other day transvaginal ultrasounds, testicular biopsies, daily injections, etc. Our life became all about having a baby. It changed almost everything. We became different people. The cycles of small amounts of hope followed by tremendous disappointment month after month take their toll quickly. Those of you that have struggled with infertility know.......
what I mean and those of you that haven’t I don’t think can fully understand. I don’t expect people to. Some of our friends and family were supportive, others weren't. If you do have a friend or family member going through this please be kind to them. Relaxing or any other advice, not helpful, just listen. It’s a real medical diagnosis, even though insurance in Nebraska does not recognize it. It can’t always be fixed. Okay, off my soap box.

Infertility sucks, no doubt about it. It’s a huge loss that will be part of our lives forever. While most of our blog will be about our adoption journey we wanted to share a small piece of our story and how we came to be here. For other couples going through this we are always open to talking in more detail.

Our infertility has changed us both in many ways. Believe it or not most of them for the better. It’s made us stronger more confident people. Humor and laughter have helped us a lot through the difficult times so I present to you….

The top 10 things I learned being part of an infertile couple

1. I kick ass at peeing on small sticks and in cups. Undiscovered skill before and now refined. I think last count over the past 2 years I’ve taken probably 50-60 home pregnancy tests. I can compete with the best of them. I saw a positive one time and that was because I purposely peed on one after I had taken the Hcg shot that triggers ovulation for a procedure. It will cause a positive test and I just wanted to see a positive once! Sad, I know.  Otherwise 0 for 50.
2. Nothing makes you crazier than desperation.
3. Alcohol makes you call pregnant women “bitches” just a little bit louder.
4. I have the best husband in the world.
5. “This is awkward” is the best response when you see people you know in the waiting room at the reproductive endocrinologist’s office.
6. A doctor doing a blessing of your “lady parts” while in stirrups does feel as sacrilegious as you would think.
7. Urologists are a different breed.
8. If you are a doctor, don’t randomly ask someone what they think of “that whole Tiger Woods thing” before telling them they may not be able to have children.
9. Be nice to people, you don’t know what they are going through every day.
10. When God closes a door he opens a window.